Of all my pregnancies I must say, my first was the easiest with regards to food. I could eat anything I wanted and boy would I try everything.
On a daily basis my food routine looked like this:
7:45 am Get to work, check everyone's lunchboxes.. pick what I want… (God forbid anyone should say no)
10:00 am Order queen cakes or whatever from Bakers Inn, tea boy knew to be on call at this time otherwise… there would be enough tears to flood the office block!
1 pm – boss ran an account at a restaurant opposite the office block and had given go-ahead for me to order whatever I wanted. I mainly wanted trout and chips although at the end of the pregnancy the poor tea boy had to hunt for downtown fish and chips. I would know if he tried to buy the healthier uptown fish and chips, it HAD to be the downtown one.
3 pm Poor tea boy was in TM buying 4 x lunch bars that I’d inhale like oxygen.
5 pm Hubby would have to stop at Kow Lees and buy me a box of assorted mini spring rolls.
Get home and eat whatever was for supper.
Yes… I gained weight!
Moving swiftly along, at the beginning of the pregnancy, I was still shopping around for gynecologists and ended up at one well-known gentleman’s office. When I went to see him I was bleeding and pretty stressed out as I thought I may be having a miscarriage. It was a Friday when I went to see him and I recall listening in shock as he told me to go and book for a D & C on Monday with his receptionist. His waiting room was packed full of pregnant women and he didn’t seem to have time for me. I left confused and in tears. When I got to the office my boss noticed I wasn’t myself.
I told him what had happened at the doctor's rooms and he sent me to see his friend, a Radiologist called Dr. Pesev. I thank God always that I went. Dr Pesev did a quick scan and showed me, my baby (pause to take that in) with a heartbeat and a blemish in the uterus which he said was an infection. He wrote out an antibiotic for me to take and told me all would be well. He also pointed me to Dr. Vinita Gupta. That man saved my baby's life.
Maita was due on the 6th of April, however by the time April arrived I was done being pregnant… DONE!
I went in on the 1st of April to see my Dr and told her through a stream of tears that I was now done and just needed her to take the baby out. She promised me that if nothing happened over the weekend she would induce me the following Monday. I went home feeling better, at least I know had a tentative date of when this baby would vacate.
My husband dropped me off at home, only to call and tell me to expect visitors later… I was upset … I was no longer keen on cooking and couldn’t believe anyone would invite themselves over to my house knowing my condition.
Strangely enough, I had hardly eaten over the previous two days and that evening was no different. My sister came over because I’d gone on and on about having to cook and entertain but even though she was there I insisted on cooking a HUGE pot of sadza all by myself.
I also kept going to the toilet to pee although really nothing was coming out. I made countless toilet trips that day. Meanwhile, my darling sister had taken the initiative and called my husband to cancel the dinner arrangements as pregazilla (me) was on the loose vying for blood.
When he got home, I remember being in pain but wasn’t sure that it was sore enough to be called labour. I told him I wanted to take a nap and he refused, he got my bag and pretty much had to shove me in the car because I didn’t want to go. It was now almost midnight when we arrived at Baines. I literally screamed at him not to take my bag out of the car as I was sure they were going to tell me I wasn’t far enough along and send me back home. The whole time, I was mentally growling at him. I told him I didn’t want to embarrass myself by looking over-eager, bag in hand. I don’t even recall how he smuggled the bag in, but he did.
It was my first baby, so I had no idea there was what they call a waiting ward and a labour ward. I, was ushered to a labour ward. Had I known the difference, I would have quickly realized I was really in labour.
The midwife came in to check me for dilation (what an experience). This was the first time it had ever happened to me, so I was quite happy to open my legs to get checked….. um… from that moment on, the phobia began… I HATE being checked now.
Anyway, she said I was about 3cm dilated. Given that I was one of Dr. Gupta’s patients, she mentioned I needed to have an enema. Another first time experience, I had never had one but only had a vague idea of what it was. They used a tube to push soapy water into my rectum and moments later I desperately needed to use the toilet. So, I hopped off the bed and went to the adjacent toilet to relieve myself. I was now in quite a lot of pain. Then I discovered a shower in the bathroom.
Needless to say, the midwife had to come and drag me out of the hot shower and usher me back to the labour bed.
As labour progressed, the hot and cold feelings began. They would put a blanket on me when I got cold and almost instantly, I’d be sweating profusely, asking them to remove it again. Hubby was sitting by my side and I kept begging him to give me my phone so I could call my mom to tell her how much pain I was in. He kept saying okay, let me just get it out of my pocket, made me wonder if his pocket was a never-ending tunnel in his jeans.
Finally, I was at 7cm and was given the miracle drug pethidine. I was now napping between contractions. Then suddenly a lot was happening! The pain amplified tenfold and I was screaming for help. I recall a midwife coming in, saying ‘Iwe Tau stop making a racket’. Wrong thing to say😤! I screamed for her to get out and told her I NEVER wanted to see her again in my life.
Suddenly the room was full of people. I was being told to lie on my back, not on my side and to raise my legs.
I couldn’t, I was tired…. I was irritated, I was in pain. The room suddenly seemed full of people, none of whom were my doctor.
Then my doctor arrived and I recall saying to her, ‘’you are wearing the same clothes from this afternoon”, yes… at 10cm that is what I was thinking. The amniotic sac was still intact so my doctor used something that looked like a long pair of scissors to burst it open. All this fluid gushed out and I remember thinking it felt warm.
My doctor now stood at one leg and my husband was asked to stand by the other, then they told me to push. This was my first baby, had no idea what I was doing or what they meant. The midwife told me to act like I was trying to do a number two. So I did.
I pushed with all my might whilst trying to breathe at the same time. Then reality struck. My greatest fear, the crowning of the head, was upon me … all the reality shows I’d watched went on and on about this. So when I felt the baby's head begin to crown and the doctor confirming what I felt, my tells me that the fear on my face was palatable. He said it was like a mask of fear had come over my face.
I was panicking but had to keep my head in the game. I could hear my doctor saying, "please push Tau", from a distance. So I gave one huge effort… grunting and heaving, then my baby girl’s head popped out. Another push and her body followed at 0106hrs on the 2nd of April 2004.
The pain left immediately. One minute, I was seeing the heavenly lights and angels welcoming me and the next it was all over.
For some reason I was freaked out about the baby's feet, they looked too long and thin. It's only now, that I know that newborn's feet often look this way because of little to no fat. My husband assured me that all was well, that she indeed had ten digits on both hands and feet. Her umbilical cord was clamped and hubby got to cut the cord (he said it felt rubbery) and was immediately given his daughter to hold.
I was still in a state of shock at what had just happened. It was so odd, I couldn’t actually believe the baby had come out of me. Her Apgar scores were 8 then 10, apparently she didn’t cry quickly enough and her colour was slightly off. She was wiped down vigorously, put on a scale then put on a warmer (under some lights).
Then came the thing no one really tells you about; the expelling of the placenta. My doctor says to me, "Okay, let us get the placenta out!"… and I’m just laying there. She nudges me and says, "push ka!" I push and she tugs a little, then woosh, out it popped.
Then the doctor was like this is the placenta, I wasn’t looking but hubby was keen and later told me it looked real!!!
I got stitches because I tore. Apparently, I tore because I wasn’t listening when they told me how to push, and they were probably right. For some reason the local anaesthetic she injected hit the spot, so I felt every single one of the seven stitches I got.
The best thing about that labour ward at Baines is never seeing any blood. I have no idea how they do it, but they kept me tidy and I never saw anything.
Once the baby was warm, they asked me for her clothes. They changed her really quickly and professionally and then handed my baby to me. They asked me to breastfeed her, I feigned fatigue. The truth was I had no idea where to begin and wanted some privacy to try and figure it out. They gave me a cup of tea which was the most amazing cup of tea ever, then I was wheeled up to my room. I was still high from the pethidine and general euphoria that goes with birth.
With my first baby, I remember the day they let us go home. I kept thinking; "seriously, you guys are seriously giving me this living being to take home with me?" Talk about growing up FAST!
Post written and shared by Taurayi Gama nee Chikwakwata
I have yet to give birth but I hope my experience will be as easy as possible despite what ever complications may happen such as yours. Beautiful story here